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A, no te millennials whakawhirinaki na te kaha i runga i to ratou smartphones ki te hanga me te mau tonu hononga whaiāipo, e taea e ahau te tiki i te hua romance ki te matomato, kahore tetahi? E rua Nokia waea (ae, i te mea ki te kore Whatsapp me kahore pāpāho pāpori), me te rua tōmua kāri SIM, ia ki te $ rohe. Hoki i te marama, katoa kōrero ki te pa mā te Nokia waea, ka i reira te hiahia kia kahore he pakaru o te kāri SIM rohe. E te auraa fakafuofua SMS (i te utu e rima hēneti ia), me kore ngā pikitia (te tuku ia ratou mā MMS utu i waenganui i te me te hēneti ia wa, i runga i te rahi image). Anake te ra ki te whakamātau, tatou ka rere ki roto ki te raruraru. Ka e ahau i te text Whatsapp i George i runga i toku iPhone, korero mai ki ahau, e te waea Nokia ko e kore e te mahi tika. Hohoro ahau texted hoki: «te PAI AHAU KIA MAHI KI a te REIRA, MUTU i te KORERO KI AHAU i RUNGA i TENEI WAEA, TE REIRA te TINIHANGA». Te ahau i whakaritea mo te waea ki te kia tonoa atu ki a ia, a ka fakapapau’i e te reira e tae ia ki a ia i te poutumarotanga te ra i muri mai. Rite pm haere mai, a haere ana, miharo ahau ki te mea i nga waea kua te humarie tukua. Ahau i whawhai ki te whakamatautauranga, ki te kuputuhi i a ia i runga i tona waea atamai, me te, hei utu mo, ka tonoa e ia he SMS mā te Nokia ki te tirohia, ki te hiahia ia ki te riro i te waea. Ua ite au i na huma – toku atamai auraa e ahau i whakamahia ki te whiwhi i te whakautu tata tonu. I roto i tenei take, i ahau kahore whiriwhiri, engari ki te noho me te tatari mo George ki te kuputuhi, i ahau i te te whakahou. I ia – e rima haora i muri. Tahuri i roto i te, ia ia i te hoatu i te pūhiko i roto i te ara he, me te kore i ite i te reira. I roto i taua wa, tamata e ahau ki te faahema i ahau i te miharo aha ko te mau-ake. Ka haere ahau mo te tina, ka tutaki ki te hoa – engari i te hoki o toku matenga, i tatari ahau ki te whakarongo ki te jingle i te waea ki te korero ki ahau e te karere i haere mai i roto i te. George i te iti raruraru atu i ahau te hanga i te whakawhitinga hoki ki a non-waea atamai. Ia e kore te nui o te kaituhi, me te pai kōrero kanohi-ki-te-kanohi. «Ki te tuhinga, te reira uaua ki te korero ki te kare muri i a ratou,» ka korerotia e ia ki ahau. «Na hoki ahau, e kore te mea te puka pai o te kōrero. Au e ahau he wahi tawhito-pupuku, me te hiahia ia te wā kounga ki te tangata i ahau te kitenga i. «I runga i te tahi atu i te ringa, ua ite e ahau i te rerekētanga i ētahi atu tino. Tuatahi o nga mea katoa, i te tepe pūāhua hanga roa kōrero mā te kuputuhi tata e taea. Ahau e aro ki te korero ki a ia e pā ana ki te pehea, toku ra i haere atu a, homai taku mahi ka rite ki te kaituhi, taea e koe te mea e ahau e kore au e tino pai ki te te kupu o te rohe. Instagram kua ki te hei i te nuinga o te whakamahi te taupānga i runga i toku waea (i tua atu i Whatsapp), me pinepine ahau i te fariuraa panuku i roto i toku whangai i te tika ki te haere i te wa. Te nuinga o te wā, a, no te ahau i te teití, te tangata, ka ahu ahau ki te whaia i to ratou kōtaha ki te kitea i roto i te mea hanga te reira ki to ratou kai, te mea runaruna e ratou, me te, o te akoranga, pikitia o to ratou ex girlfriends. Haere hoki ki te taketake ki te Nokia te auraa tetahi o tenei ko e taea, me te, he pono, e toku hoa ui e ahau te mea George titiro rite, kihai ahau i whai i te kotahi tau whakaahua i a ia ki te whakaatu ki a ratou. Te roroa, ka mea ahau, feebly. Um. tūpuhi? Āhuatanga peka, ua haapii mai au i te tahi mau haapiiraa i roto i te teití. Waho i te pēhanga o te hinaaro ki te pupuri i runga i te awa tamau o te ipurangi-kōrero, ahau ite e ahau i taea te tango i nga mea pōturi, a ka tatari ki te whakatau i a Hōri ki te kitea i roto i atu e pā ana ki a ia i roto i te tangata. I te mea e pā ana ki te fe’ave’aki i te mea e te reira e faatupu i te tikanga teka o te herehereraa – e kore ai koutou e kua tutaki te tangata neke atu i te ringa o te wa, engari smartphones (e tukua ki a koe tonu te noho i roto i te pa, i te haapa’oraa i ripa i runga i ta te atu tangata kei te mahi i te) ki te hanga i ite koe ofi ki te tangata e kitenga. Ahau ako ki te mauruuru i te waea i te reira i hoki iho – e te auraa e kore e te haamau’araa i te rota o toku wa i noho i runga i, no tona kuputuhi i muri e haere mai i roto i, me te whakaora i te hohonu kōrero mo to tatou kanohi-ki-kanohi hui-ups. Ki tenei i roto i te ngakau, i rapua e ahau ki te poipoi i te atu tūturu o te hononga ki George, ara, no te tatou e eita i te hui i roto i te tangata. A ia, i roto i te tahuri, i te taua. Kua ahau hoki i ngā raruraru e hiahia ana ahau ki te wā rapu i maimoatanga hoki, a kotahi te po, texted ahau George ki te korero ki a ia e ahau, kua riro toku X-ray hua. Miharo ia i ahau e karanga ana ki te ui ahau i te mahi – te tahi mea, ara, toku hoa tata kore te mahi i roto i te tau o Whatsapp. George te kaha ki te karanga i whakakitea e ia, i atawhaitia, i tiakina. I wareware ahau i te whai huatanga o te taua, he tohu iti – i muri i te katoa, i enei ra, i ahau anake te korero ki te iwi i runga i te waea mo te mahi, ranei ki te tono i te hea o toku hoa, ina e ratou te mutunga, ki te whakatau i ahau. Otiia i roto i te e -miniti kōrero – te wahi chatted matou, kata, a ka ki te mohio ki tahi i te tahi – te kaha ki te noa whakarongo ki te tangata te reo, me te reo ua matara atu te tupu i te patua o ngā karere kuputuhi. I muri i te malí o nga wiki, George ka hoatu e ahau he upoko-ake e e riro te reira i te ohipa te wā i mahi hoki ki a ia, e te auraa e te fe’ave’aki e pōturi iho tino. Ka mohio ahau e ko ia fakamamafa’i, me te whakaaro e pā ana ki te mea ki te mahi ki te whakaatu i te faaitoitoraa. I roto i tetahi atu tūkunga, e tukua atu koa tuhinga ranei gif ki te pupuri i tona wairua ake, ranei pea te hoko te gift ipurangi, me te whai fakafolau reira ki tona whare mo te orotika ohorere. Engari ki te ia kia pukumahi, me te reira i te iti-i te watea ki te hoko online ki te waea Nokia, i ahau ki te tiki auaha. Faaoti e ahau ki te mahi i te tahi mea e ahau e kore e, te mahi a ake ake: whakaatu ake i tona whare ki te tuhi i te kāri, me etahi hoki te oranga. Just i mua i te haere ahau i runga i, whakawhirinaki ahau i roto i te hoa, a korerotia ana ki a ia te mea e ahau i te whakamahere ki te mahi. «Kei te haere ia ki te whakaaro ahau he stalker. «Ahau despaired. «Te tangata e tahuri ake i te tatau i enei ra??Well, e te he aha te iwi i a rātou e ngana ana ki te faivá te tangata matahiti i ma’iri a’e, me te reira i te reka tohu, » ka mea ia, i a ia e egged ahau i runga i. Na e te rite mea i mea ai ahau. Taku mahere taketake ko te ki te taka i te mea atu i roto i tona pouaka – e tahuri i roto i ki te kia kiia. Ka korerotia e ahau ki ahau i ahau ki te kite i te misioni i roto i, a faaoti ki te waiho noa te mea homai noa i runga i George o te paepae. Kia aroha mai, kahore he ataahua putanga hoki i ahau. Tona whaea, mau ahau e tu mangere ana i waho o to ratou fare, i mutu i ahau ake te maere tona papa, haere ana a tawhio noa shirtless. Roa kōrero poto, George ko te karanga, me te ahau i tukua i runga i toku homai i roto i te tangata. Ahau numinumi kau kanapa whero ka rite ki ahau te otohetohe ka korerotia ki a ia e whakaaro ahau e ia kia hiahia ana koe ki te tiki. Ki te whakaaro ia ahau i te kōeke-A creeper, ia te pono, kihai hoki te whakaatu i te reira. Ahakoa e kore ahau e taunaki putanga ohorere ana, i o koutou rā o te tatau i runga i te wā, i te wheako whakakitea mai ki ahau kihai i whai ahau ki te taka hoki i runga i te tika fe’ave’aki ki te whakaatu i te aroha. I taea e ahau te hoatu i kaha ake ki te whakamahere mea iti, i te tāpiri i te aroha pa ki te pihi i te hononga. Te kaha utua atu i a ia i muri texted, a ka korerotia e ahau e ahau i «reka atu i a kihi». I roto i tenei wa, i hanga e ahau he hoa hou i roto i te kaukau o te piha haapiiraa e ahau i tango – Mr Goh*, he sprightly koroua nei i roto i tona s. I runga i te tina, ka ui ahau ki a ia ki te korero ki ahau e pā ana ki te aha ko reira rite, no te ia me tana wahine i te teití. «Kia korerotia e ahau ki a koe, ka mau te reira i te katoa i te tau o te teití i mua i a tatou ahakoa pupuri te ringa,» ka mea ia. «Kite ahau i tona kotahi i nga wiki. E karanga ahau ki a ia, ka ui ki a ia i roto i, me e ko e, » tonu ia. Me pēhea te roa i enei waea whakamutunga, kua whakamatauria e ahau. «E kore e roa i te katoa. Ko te reira mooni ki te whakatika i te ra, me te wa ki te whakatau ia, a ka tatou i whakairihia ake. Ko te mea ohie,» ka mea ia. «Pau ahau te toenga o oku wa i mahi i te mea e ahau aroha. E haere ahau i roto i te, kite i te iwi, e taku mea ake. «Ka e ahau whakaaro. Ahakoa e kore ahau e ahau e pā ana ki ki te tatari i te tau katoa ki te pupuri i te tangata i te ringa, Mr. Goh te mau parau o te mau tonu i te pono. To tatou smartphones te utu tatou kia nui tere me te tōtika (e kua pono i hanga i te ora māmā), otiia pea a, no te haere mai te reira ki te romance, e kore te reira e tukino i ki te waiho i te iti ake tawhito-pupuku, me te tango i to tatou wa ki te tiki ki te mohio ki te tangata. Hei utu mo o te titiro ki te mata o te kiko i te pūmanawa i te aroha ki te moni, ranei obsessing over a, no te haere ia ki te whakautu i toku kuputuhi, ka taea e ahau te hanga i toku tōtu’a, e toku mea ake, me te kia te ihirangi i roto i te taua. A, no te mahi ahau i kite i te tangata, i ahau ka whai kia nui atu ki te mea ki a ia e pā ana ki te mea kua ahau ki runga ki te, a ka taea e tatou te hanga i te wā i pau tahi te pono tatau. Aue, me te ki te e miharo koe, George, me te ahau tonu te fe’ave’aki i runga i to tatou Nokia phones. well, i te iti rawa tae noa ki to tatou tōmua kāri SIM rere i roto i te moni. Haere i te ngā hou, me te te rongo ki runga ki te ahua, hokohoko, ataahua, āhua, te whanaungatanga & celebs me te pōwhiri ki te ahua events, whakatairanga motuhake i to tatou hoa, me te tūponotanga ki te riro i te nui taonga a, no te haina koe ake.

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